Aaah... the sounds of summer. The lawn mowers, the screaming?
Question:children; the miniature motorcycles racing back and forth on the street. The chipper shredders, busy chewing up an entire forest and a bucket full of rocks; the birds that start shreiking at 4:30 am; thefireworks and all of the neighbors' dogs.
How ever do you stay sane during this bedlam?
Answers:
I like to feed the little children a lot of cheese. It plugs them so that they are too constipated and very busy in the bathroom instead of on the streets. I like to feed the little birdies cheese too because they can also get constipated. If you feed them too much cheese, you will have to pick up dead birds off of your lawn--no singing though!
I like to feed the little doggies a lot of cheese for the same reason, but you have a unique situation here. You should just light the fireworks while they are attatched to the dogs. Solves two problems at one time.
You can also put cheese into the motorcycle, mower, and chipper gas tanks. No more of those! Muah ha ha ha! Another option is to plug the chipper blades with tons of cheese...
However, there always is the chance that your neighbors will beg you to share your mower, motorcycle, chipper, etc. with them because their's are out of commission. Ooopsies! But, hey, no big deal--just stick some extra cheese in your ears for earplugs.
craziness...i agree! Dual Paned windows do the trick...keeps cool air in----hot air out---kids screaming etc out.
other than that.crank up the tunes, have a glass of wine and log on to ANSWERS.
Have a Great Summer! :)
ps...wish for rain (hahahaha)
LOL..i know what you're talking about with the birds.THOSE THINGS ARE FREAKIN ANNOYING
it's the sound of life in the summer,don't forget the dogs barking. you'd miss it if it wasn't there
Ever tried ear plugs? LOL. They usually do the trick. If not aim by doing all the noises too,perhaps some of the folks getting your message than and will be more careful.
sounds like u live on my street, don't forget they r in pools too. lol. i'm doing it now got a/c cranked up, answering questions on yahoo. Good ole summer we can't wait for it. then we wish it would snow. i live right at 1-75 talk about noisey.
You don't. heh heh heh. But there are ways to get rid of the noise.
First of all, in the dead of night, get dressed in all black and color your face with a black sharpie. Then, creep over to your neighbor's garage. After breaking in by shattering a couple of windows, quietly tiptoe up to the lawn mower. Quietly disassemble the lawn mower engine with a baseball bat.
Repeat this process with the motorcycles and screaming children.
Now, the birds... at exactly 4:02, carefully scale the pole to the bird houses. Insert a piece of cork into each hole in the bird house.
If the birds just have nests in trees, or if you just want to be on the safe side, spread rice on your lawn. That way, any free birds will explode after eating the rice.
As for the chipper... send it to the rainforests in South America... I hear people are trying to get rid of those forests, so it would be put to good use.
And lastly, the fireworks and dogs. Just when your neighbor is at work, carefully break into his or her house by shattering the rest of their windows. Raid their fireworks and matches. Then return home. Later, right before your neighbor takes their dog for a walk, tie a string to a bone and set the bone across the street from your house. Take the other end of the string and hide in the bushes and wait. Then, as your neighbor walks their dog past, pull the string and bone towards the bush in which you are hiding. The dog should run away and chase the bone. When it reaches your bush, tie the fireworks to the dog with the sparking end of the fireworks pointed away from the rear of the dog. Light the fireworks and run. The fireworks should propel the dog far far away, so you probably won't see it again.
Repeat this process for any other dogs in the neighborhood or children you missed when you were using that baseball bat.
Hope this helps.
It's sure beats that darned Snow and Ice in winter!
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