A neighbour has complained to me about my kids continued?
Question:To everyone who replied with advice for me but said that my neighbour asking nicely for the kids to stop climbing on the fence, she didnt ask nicely, she came to my door threatening my kids and myself and was very abbusive towards me. I want to keep the peace but felt i needed some advice.
Thanks to everyone who replied, it always pays to see other peoples view! D x
Answers:
That's was not very nice or kind of her, just try your best to keep the kids off the fence as it is obviously irritating her and let it be. I cannot stand aggro approaches but rise above it and let it go ok. Have a lovely day and take care.:)
call the cops on her if she is really abusive.
get the local youth to hound them till they move ! it worked for me and only cost £50 and 20 lambert and butler
Do nothing whatsoever. If your neighbour becomes increasingly threatening, take an ASBO out on them. Kids are kids and are known for running about and jumping/climbing on things.
Your neighbour is so angry because they didn't have as fun a childhood.
have you ever watched the movie dickie roberts? wait til their rabbit dies and let the dog bringit in, wash it and put it back in the cage... then start screaming devil rabbit. =)
no really... tell her/him to shove it and go get laid.
I would get the law involved if anyone were to yell at my kids.
Sounds like you deserve each other
Neighbors can really be jerks. Who owns the fence, if it is the neighbors then keep the kids off. If it is yours or a shared fence then tell the neighbor to get stuffed.Also, if your neighbor threatened you have the cops come out and talk to them. Threats are against the law, especially if it is toward children. And if all else fails, wait til your neighbor is gone and then get them back by some unproveable deed like painting their driveway pink, or tacks, or condoms hanging from their trees. ha ha
Well, just try your best to make sure the kids aren't climbing on the fence, but if she continues threatening you, you should call the cops for harassment and explain to them that she is making threats.
kids will do what they have too. just a perspective your Neighbor over looked !
Whether she was abusive or not consider nothing but your kids' behaviour.
If you own the fence then it's up to you if they climb on it and risk damaging it. If they make it fall into her garden though they could cause damage for which you could be held liable. If she owns the fence then your kids have no right to climb on it.
It could be a good time to teach your kids about consideration for other peoples feelings. Your neighbour clearly feels strongly about what they are doing so telling them not to climb there out of consideration for her could be a useful lesson for them.
Difficult neighbours can make life hell so you might want to consider the longer term effects of what you decide to do.
If it was me I would stop my kids climbing just to make sure the fence doesn't get damaged no matter who it belonged to.
i would have a calm word, tell her that you will keep the children out of her garden but in yours they can do what they want and if that includes climbing the fence so be it, however if it is solely just her fence tell her your sorry and you will keep them off it. If she is still rude then tell her you have tried reasoning with her and now you dont care anymore and your kids can play where they want, this will show her that you won't be a pushover and will help her approach you calmly in future
As a parent, you are supposed to have eyes in the back of your head and be alert to what your children are doing 24/7 whilst they are within your sight and/or sound. Accordingly, it was up to you to be aware BEFORE your neighbour had cause to complain that your children were possibly causing a nuisance - and therefore you are responsible for your neighbour's complaint to you.
Had you noticed what your children were doing and stopped them and/or disciplined them properly - then it would NOT have been necessary for your neighbour to have had cause to complain in the first place.
Are you a renter or house owner. House Owners are very picky about their fences, lawns, and almost everything else. This is because it costs money to repair, and you protect your investment. A renter may feel less interest, being that the responsible person is another. To keep the peace, take your children to the park for a while. And if you have a back yard, and they play in it, put some boundaries, tell and watch them, making sure they listen. Show them how to respect others property and they will be more careful. The neighbor might have lost belief in you, just do the right thing and she cannot say anything.
Didn't see you previous question, but going on what you say here....why on earth are you letting your kids climb on her fence in the first place?
I can see why she'd be aggressive - I 'd be livid and wouldn't want the little brats climbing on my fence either. When they break it down, are you going to be straight round there offering to replace it immediately at your own cost? Hmmm..
If you want to keep the peace, maybe you should take your kids in hand a bit more?
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edit:
Just looking in again, and in view of you saying this
*Thanks to everyone who replied, it always pays to see other peoples view!*
Are you doing a 'social experiment' here??
I don't blame your neighbor for not wanting her property distroyed. Control your kids.
your neighbor looks indeed rude. but you'd better think more about your son or daughter. if he or she does something what he or she just did. i think you will live unhappy. therefore the only thing you do is that you should give him or her advice for his or her behavior.
If it's her fence, apologize for the inconvenience for the sake of keeping peace and try to keep the kids off it. If it's your fence, there is not much she can do about it, the kids can treat it as a jungle gym. Of course, that won't help with keeping the peace.
If she threatened you and your kids file a police report against her in case of future problems or put up a bigger fence!
My dear, as a mum with grown children, I am horrified at how I see Children staying on the down side of discipline in professionaly succesfull parents.. Children not obeying their parents... can end up in all sorts of trouble more often then not. What springs to my mind reading your turmoil, is in my view, a total collaps of solid real live chat.. "Catch mine?"
I thoroughly analyse you words, and cannot help but feel sorry for your You, your Neighbour, and your wayward Kids...
You've posted this second Q. " You are obviously not sattisfied and still insecure." So the matter hasn't been resolved for you in real life. I usually blend in with all the party's aspects to come to a more permanent resolve... Wich means I have to take my own mistakes into account on a fair level of honesty.
Was your Reprimande too harsh, so Children may not obey out of Defiance?
Are you a busy mum juggling 3 jobs, tired, morning, noon and night, who's lost touch with the easy Magic involving toddlers?
How long have the children been climbing the fence over the past time? How often, have they rejected your neighbours comments to stop climbing? Our instincts immediately pull up every defence, that will forbid another parent having a genuine beef with ones own kids:" How often I was tempted to burst out in defence of my two Angels." Blunder to say the least.. Climbing other peoples Fences, are a common misschief in kids, and it's up to you to make your kids understand this... Society is a harsh place, when one needs to make a living. Don't expect miracles, when you have lost the memory to repeat your lessons. in the same consequence as your own mum did with you?
When I saw certain processes of deterioration set in before 1996, I was faced, to take a deep look inside Society's processses...
Phone the police and keep the kids away from the fence. Keep a record (in a diary, etc) of everything that's been said and done. You may never need it or, like I unfortunately did, you may.
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