I can't Seem to be nearly as comfortable in the company of other people as when I'm alone?
Question:Whenever I'm in the presence of other people, I can't relax like when I'm alone. It's like I feel jittery and anxed up around people. Is this like social anxiety? I think it affects how I relate, converse, and befriend others, including dating. Also when it comes to school, I seem to learn better on my own by reading rather than listening, but I still do reasonably well with mid 70s avg in college. I can't concentrate or relax too well when I study with other people or do group work. I seem to be more naturally comfortable on my own. I am unnaturally uncomfortable around groups of people. The same thing goes for my job, and going to work, because I work at a public place. Anyway, even when I play golf, I seem to relax much better when there are less people, and less things going on around me. I have fine talent, but I need to work on being comfortable.
If I were to become a writer/author, this would be a comfortable job for me, although challenging. But it would be satisfying
Answers:
It could also be a mild form of autism. Maybe you should read up on it and think about your childhood and see if there are parallels?
I also have the same type issues, don't feel bad about it. You have found a way to make your life work for you. That's all that's important.
you seam very comfortable trying to explain your problem to a bunch of strangers.. Good luck!
Your not alone,I'm the same way. I'm very uncomfortable with other people around me.Thatss hard when you work in retail!
communication is key in today's society and there aren't many jobs that would allow you to live a life of solitude. even authors have to deal with editors, publishers and even their readers. besides it's unlikey that you'll be able to support yourself on that career alone. you'll probably hafta end up working part time at mcdonald's or something. but you could try it.
or you could see a doctor and get a prescription for paxil. it sounds like you need it.
Hi!!
I totally understand!! It is called "Agoraphobia". I know, because I have it, too.
The way you learn (reading vrs. listening) may be partially because people learn in different ways. However, I'm sure a lot of it comes from not being able to consentrate because of being uncomfortable around the people.
I'm sure you are a nice person, I think I am, too. I'm conservative (my husband was the pastor of a Baptist church for 30 years. )
I'm sure you are anxious in public. That is a result of Agoraphobia, not a problem on it's on.
I made good grades in school (high school and college), too. If it makes you feel any better, we did it in spite of our "issues" .(as my daughter calls them. LOL)
No one is perfect. All people have some kind of "issue" (challenge). Some "issues" are just more obvious than others. If someone is in a wheelchair, you know what his challenge is. We are different.We look totally "normal". (there is no "normal" in life!!) Therefore, we aren't supposed to have any problems. I'm 55 yrs. old. I've been living with this all my life (I can first remember it back when I was really young), you are younger than I am. Things like this are more "accepted" today. When I was growing up, you never admitted your "short-comings". It was as if, not to mention them made them not true. Also, today, there is help for a lot of these things. I'm not sure where you live, but when I was diagnosed, I lived in MA and I had a really good doctor (a Psychopharmachologist). I suggest you talk to your doctor and have him refer you to someone. There is lots of help out there these days!
My most comfortable situation, is with animals. Animals don't lie. When you learn their body language, it ALWAYS means the same thing. I can go into groups of people (usually), but not comfortably!! When I'm with animals, however, I'm not only comfortable, but I'm in charge ("pack leader" with dogs).
I think your idea of becoming a writer/author is a good idea. No matter what our "hang ups", there's always something we can do. The trick is to find out what our talents are, what we are interested in, and combine them with something we feel comfortable with. If you do what you enjoy (which includes being comfortable), you will never really have to "work".
I wish you luck in your future, but remember, there is help out there!!
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