Do I say something?...?
Question:My sister's house is an absolute pig sty. The dirt is thick on the floor, the firer is over loaded with ashes after burning paper, there is piles of toys and clothes on the kitchen table and the coffee table, there are cat hairs everywhere, her sink is always full of dirty cups and plates,her bathroom is filthy, i would hate to see her bedroom! I am so ashamed. I don't know if i should say something to her? I'm not sure if what way she would take it if i did though, i don't want to fall out with her over it but something hasto be done about it, it really can't be healthy for her and her six year old son. Should i say something to her and if so how do i go about saying it to her?
Answers:
nonsense nobody is snowed under they cant tidy up its laziness im very house proud have three children a part time job and a social life its not hard an hour in the morning and an hour in the evening,if it was my sister i would tell her and just say that you did not want anyone else to say to her after all im sure she would be gutted if a non family member told her
You don't have to say anything, she already know it. If you honestly want to help why not say, instead of having coffee today, how bout I help you organize this room? Or I'll clean the kitchen while you pick up the living room and we can get this done in a few minutes and that will give us time to relax and you won't have to worry abou the housework anymore today!
she,s your sister of course you can tell her and in no uncertain terms
Maybe she has her hands full..
offer to come help her tidy up one weekend or something..
you never know she might welcome the help.
That's disgusting. Why does her old man let her get away with that?
You want to quietly suggest to him that he don't give her any money this week until she has a tidy up.
I'll bet she gets moving real quick then.
Give that a try babe, good luck to you.
EDIT
Ah, single mother. Now I understand.
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Maybe your sister is overworked.you mention a six year old son...is she a working single mother. If so she is probably to tired to clean up. ...she could also be suffering from depression. Talk to her about it gently ...ask if she needs some help to clean up .and see if you can find out the source of the problem and then go from there. A problem is unsolvable unless you know the root of it.
she probably already realises it isnt good, and either cant be bothered to do it or doesnt really mind.
why dont you approach it in a way that doesnt make her feel as though you are digging at her, like reccomending a good cleaner or something you know, or suggest one day you help her out have a fresh summer clean because you know what its like not having the time to keep on top of the housework, and empathise that maybe a lot of her time is taken up by her son. If she reacts badly to this, im sure she will get over it.
not knowing how old she is(and it doesn't matter) she needs to take care of the mess herself.that's the only way she might learn to keep it clean.if she has any kid's offer to take care of them while she cleans.is she depressed and doesn't care? you should suggest her going to get help from her dr. in any case,yes you should tell her.it's unhealthy,and the fire place can be a danger,if that mess isn't cleaned
Do you think your sister could be depressed? The state of the house could be indication that she has given up. Maybe you could help get her house in order, as she may not know where to begin and the task seems too daunting for her.
try to be more helpful and less judgemental obviously she is not coping what is wrong is she unhappy ill or depressed .
Does her child seem neglected or hungry .
Or does she simply have different standards to you does she get out and about or stay at home you are her sister find out and help her not moan about her
Why not try helping her out with the tidying and have a good clear out. Maybe she doesnt know where to start and a helping hand might get her back on track. Make her a cleaning rota that she can stick on the wall and look at on a daily basis, that way she will manage to keep on top of things.
for her next birthday/xmas make up some vouchers each entitling her to 1hour (or whatever is convenient to you) of housework to be done by you. She can present you with one of these and when convenient you can do housework for that period of time. When you start you could say to her, lets see how much I can achieve in this time, and maybe she will jump in and help. Maybe she is just overwhelmed now that things have got out of hand.
Worth a try and it won't cost you a bean
Good luck
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